(General talk about) jokes and humour

[Atthis]

Ha ha ha! That was so funny to read; the first knock knock joke that Mervi understands, Nuytsia doesn't! I can't believe you didn't know who You-know-who is, Nuytsia! Ahh, that's great! I would have thought that even if you haven't read the books, the movies and very public general knowledge about Harry Potter would have been enough.

But I think Nuytsia is right. All the knock knock jokes I know are a play on words. As far as I can tell, they're either a play on the initial answer to "who's there?"...
- Knock knock
- Who's there?
- Lettuce
- Lettuce who?
- Lettuce in, would you.

or a play on that answer combined with the word "who" (as in Mervi's Harry Potter example).
- Knock knock
- Who's there?
- Boo
- Boo who?
- Don't cry; it's only a joke.

As you can see, these knock knock jokes are seldom laugh-out-loud funny. :rolleyes: The usual response is a groan.

Now 1000 points to anyone who can come up with a Robin Hobb-related knock knock joke!

[Nuytsia]

Heh I get it now Mervi! I suspected the magic spell words was Harry Potter related!
I sort of had a vague notion of what the joke must be about, but really wasn't sure!

Right on Atthis, good explanation!

Ok I have my thinking cap on to come up with a Robin Hobb one!!

[Nuytsia]

Ooh I forgot about this!

Ok let's see.....

-knock knock
-who's there
-Burrich
-Burrich who?
-Gesundheit!

Hehehe that's almost another class of knock knock jokes all of it's own. Those based on the 'Name who' sounding like a sneeze.....

Robin Hobb names are kind of hard to make knock knock jokes out of.......

Errr what about.....

-knock knock
-who's there?
-Thymara
-Thymara who?
-Thymara we might finally get to Kelsingra!

[Albertosaurus Rex]

...I don't get the one about Thymara.

I did recently compose a "Tom Swifty" about Robin Hobb. A Tom Swifty is a quote, always attributed to Tom, in which the verb or adverb plays into the quote. Some examples:

* "Who left the toilet seat down?" Tom asked peevishly.
* "Pass me the shellfish," said Tom crabbily.
* "That's the last time I'll stick my arm in a lion's mouth," the lion-tamer said off-handedly.
* "Can I go looking for the Grail again?" Tom requested.
* "I unclogged the drain with a vacuum cleaner," said Tom succinctly.
* "I might as well be dead," Tom croaked.
* "We just struck oil!" Tom gushed.
* "They had to amputate them both at the ankles," said Tom defeatedly.
* "Who discovered radium?" asked Marie curiously.
* "The Battle of the Nile? A lot of fun!" said Lord Nelson disarmingly.
* "Hurry up and get to the back of the ship," Tom said sternly.
* "Would you like to ride in my new ambulance?" asked Tom hospitably.
* "Who put the moss in the bog again?" asked Tom repeatedly.
* "A word that contains all six vowels? And I suppose you want those vowels to appear in alphabetical order?" asked Tom facetiously.
* “Charlatan! Pretender! Mountebank! Quack! Rogue!” said Tom euphoniously.
* "I'm not going to evangelize the rest of the neighborhood," concluded Tom distractedly.
* "The robber is coming down the stairs," said Tom condescendingly.
* "Nnnn", Tom murmured forensically.
* "I think I'm a homosexual," said Tom half in earnest.
* "I am the bone lord," Tom proclaimed skulkingly.
* "I know who turned out the lights," Tom hinted darkly.
* "I dropped my toothpaste," said Tom crestfallenly.
* "Only one of my speakers works!" said Tom monotonously.
* "I have a split personality," said Tom, being frank.
* "It's great to be camping," said Tom with intent.
* "Baa," said Tom sheepishly.
* "It's obvious I've lost my job," said Tom redundantly.
* "I can't wait to get off this boat" said Tom assuredly.
* "Let's take this song in cut time," said Tom intuitively.
* "I don't like nun's clothing," said Tom habitually.
* "Don't you fire that gun at me," Tom shot back.
* "The Flying Trout has come to save the day!" said Tom superficially.

(source)

Now here it comes...

"I can communicate with animals!" Tom said wittily.

Isn't that clever?

[Mervi]

I think I should *hear* these jokes to get them.

Just as a note about pronounciation - here (scroll down the page) is an interview where you can here Robin pronounce "Thymara" - it's not quite what I expected it to sound like (keep in mind "there's no right or wrong way" to pronounce her characters' names though!)

[Atthis]

Burrich who! Hehehe, that is one odd-sounding sneeze! Nuytsia I don't get the Thymara one either. I'd love to listen to that recording that Mervi posted to learn how to pronounce Thymara (I always pronounced it to rhyme with Sahara), but I'll have to wait till I get home where I have a computer with a speaker. Maybe a different pronunciation would help with the joke??

Albertosaurus, I'd never even heard of a Tom Swifty before! They're great; I love them! Your Robin Hobb one made me laugh out loud (and get a slightly accusing look from my office mate), so it's definitely worth 1000 points! I also loved the Marie Curie one and "I might as well be dead" Tom croaked. Oh and off-handedly, hahaha!

---

Wait, I think I get it! Thymara is meant to sound like "tomorrow"! How did I miss that? But wow, that's quite a stretch on the pronunciation. And groan-factor there is quite high, I must say.

But nice job on coming up with these, Nuytsia. I still haven't thought of any myself. Will keep at it, though...

[Nuytsia]

Hoorah someone got it!
(I didn't say it would be FUNNY!)

I was going to say in my post that it's very hard to make knock knock jokes out of Hobb names because (a) everyone pronounces them differently and (b) a lot of them are just words already ...... Shrewd, Dutiful, Patience.... (bit hard to do the sort of knock, knock joke where a name is made into actual words....)

Ok re (a) Burrich-who doesn't work very well as a sneeze if you pronounce it correctly I know! (ie Burrick instead of Burrish).. but most knock knock jokes rely on making rather a stretch in the pronunciation.

Gees check these ones out, I think I did ok !!!!
http://www.azkidsnet.com/JSknockjoke.htm

[Albertosaurus Rex]

It's supposed to be Burrick? I always thought it was supposed to be "Burritsh".

I just realised something. Tom Swifties are always attributed to Tom. In this case, that happens to be the alias of someone in the story who can actually use the wit. The joke works on two levels.

[Liquid Ice]

Hey... I don't remember making this thread

Anywho, heres a joke...

A man was driving in the middle of nowhere down a secluded country road far from any cities. He got a flat tire, and got out to walk for help.After walking for some time, he came to a small stone monastery. He knocked on the door and roused the monks. "I've got a flat tire. Can I use your phone?" He asked.

The monks said they were sorry, but they did not have a phone. "If you stay tonight, you can get a ride on our wagon into town tomorrow," they said. So the man stayed the night, and they put him in a small room in the monastery.

In the middle of the night, the man was awakened suddenly by a noise. Not just any noise, but the loudest, most wonderful, most terrifying, most hair-raising noise ever.

He sat there, his heart beating for a few minutes, and he heard it again!Getting out of bed, he went running in the direction of the noise. It came again, making the hair on the back of his neck rise and his skin crawl. Finally, he came to a large door where the head monk was standing. The door was at least 15 feet tall, and made of solid-looking wood and metal. It had chains and bars and locks and a deadbolt on it, and was the most formidable door the man had ever seen.

"What was that sound?" He asked. "What made it? Is it behind that door?"

The head monk shook his head. "I'm sorry," he said. "I can't tell you; you're not a monk."

As the man turned away, he heard the noise again. "You have to tell me what it is," he begged.

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you, you're not a monk," said the monk.

The man tried to sleep, but couldn't get the noise out of his head. In the morning, as he was getting ready to leave, he heard the sound again. It made his ears ring and his mind whirl."Please tell me what made that sound," he said.

But the monks wouldn't. "I'm sorry, you're not a monk" was all they said.

The man left, and eventually got his car fixed and went back to his life. But he couldn't get the sound out of his mind. After a few months, he got in his car and drove and drove until he found the monastery again. He got out of his car and found the head monk. "I can't forget that sound from that night I was here. Please, please please tell me what made that sound." The head monk just shook his head.

"I can't tell you; you're not a monk," he said."Then tell me how I can become a monk," the man said.

The head monk said "It's very difficult. Are you sure you want to do this?"The man said "I've got to. I have to know what made that sound."The head monk said, "To join us, you have to perform several tasks. Your first task is to count all of the stars visible in the sky."

The man thought about how hard that would be, but he had to know what made that sound. He sat up every night for a year, counting the stars over and over until he was sure how many stars were visible in the sky. He went to the head monk and told him, and the monk nodded.

"Very good. Your next task is to count all of the grains of sand on the beaches around the world."The man knew this would be even harder, but he could not get the noise out of his head. He had to know what, what kind of animal, could make that terrible horrible mind-bending sound. So he left on his journeys. He crawled the length and breadth of every beach in the world, counting the grains of sand, and he returned to the monastery years later.The head monk heard his answer and nodded.

"Excellent. You are almost done. Your final task is to climb to the peak of the highest mountain in the world, and see yourself in relation to the rest of creation." And the man knew this would be hard, but he outfitted himself, and he went to the highest mountain in the world, and he climbed to the top, and returned months later, older and wiser and more tired than years before when he had first heard the noise, the noise that would not leave his mind and that echoed in his every waking thought.He returned, and the head monk saw that he was wiser, and said "At last, you are a monk. Come with me."

And they walked through the monastery, its twisting and turning halls, and as they went the man heard the noise again, over and over, and he was no longer sure if it was the noise or merely his memory of it.And finally, finally, he stood in front of the door and the head monk opened it up, and the man saw what had made the noise.

But, I can't tell you what it was. You're not a monk.

[Atthis]

Hey, that's mean!

But hell, it's funny too. *rushing off to send it to everyone I know*

This is definitely one of those jokes that is just 100 times funnier when you inflict it on someone else than when you hear it yourself.